Saturday, February 14, 2004

COST INVECTIVE

Let me start this rant by saying Amy has received great health care. Her doctors, the nurses, almost everyone involved has been wonderful. There is no price I wouldn't pay for Amy's well being.

That being said....

We received the generalized bill for Amy's hospital stay the other day. She was in the hospital for 24 days. The bill: $83, 668.77. That's roughly $3500.00 per day and that doesn't include the cost of her surgery!

We have health insurance. We will pay a tiny fraction of that cost as time permits, but I still was stunned to see the grand total. I called the hospital and asked for an itemized statement. The woman I spoke with almost scolded me saying something to the effect of "well, insurance is paying most of that" seemingly implying that due to that fact I shouldn't really be concerned with the costs. I asked for an itemized account anyway to which she replied, "Well, it'll be a lot of pages".

I told her that I certainly hoped that would be the case and assured her I was up to the task of reading it.

It arrived today...in a thick manila envelope.

What do you pay for Tylenol? Even if you buy actual Tylenol, not the generic acetaminophen I would suspect you pay pennies per pill. In the hospital, one 650 milligram pill of acetaminophen cost $2.65.



Amy had a private room, but we were charged the semi-private room rate because all the semi-private rooms were taken when we checked her in. Even going "coach" in the hospital cost $635.00....per day. It was a nice room. There was a bed. A window with a view of the parking lot. It had a TV, a chair, and a bathroom. Thank goodness there were no mints on the pillow.

One of things they did while Amy was in the hospital was check her blood sugar several times a day after she came off her daily "feedbag". They pricked her finger and put a drop of blood on a tiny glucose test strip which is inserted into a little device that gives you a readout. We have one of those devices at home. We buy the test strips at Walgreens. At the hospital each test strip was $37.00.

Each feedbag, by the way, cost $721.41. I've taken Amy to a few fancy restaurants in our time. Even the restaurants that are so ritzy that they don't list the prices on the menu don't have the gall to charge 700 bucks a meal.

I could go on and on. At Sam's you can buy 20 pills of benedryl for probably a buck. In the hospital, in I.V. form, one 50 miligram dose of benedryl was 25 dollars. Coincidentally that is the same price as a shot of morphine. It's also what they charge for air. Okay, oxygen. 8 hours of oxygen-$200.00.

My health insurance costs went up at the first of the year. We had meetings at work explaining the reasons and a lot of my coworkers whined and complained.

I didn't say a thing.

The itemized statement from the hospital we received today is 22 pages long...but I can boil it down to one word: insanity.

There's got to be a better way. I hope our country finds it before we all end up in the rubber Ramada...at a cost of 635 dollars a day...if we share a room.

CRUNCHY SATURDAY

Well, this doesn't happen often in San Antonio.



I'm not certain this creation made in the middle of the night by the kids across the street actually qualifies as a snowman...I'm thinking Snowglump might be a more appropriate name.



We're not going anywhere until the Sun comes up. It's not like I even own an ice scraper.



In terms of the snow and ice most folks around the country deal with..what we have today doesn't even merit a mention...except it doesn't happen here, so it's worth mentioning. At least to me.

Friday, February 13, 2004

FRIDAY OBSERVATIONS

It's cold...it's wet...anyone who tells you to watch, "Lost in Translation" is not your friend.

UPDATE ON THE ADOPTION

Got an email from our friend in Oklahoma. She's been approved for her "adoption".

This is a picture of the "new baby" - Sam.



I'm clinging to the hope that he's not chewing on some body part of his previous owner.

Thursday, February 12, 2004

TALKING GOD'S EAR OFF

Last night at church I mentioned to one of the many people who asked me to update them on Amy that I was praying for strength a lot these days. He said perhaps I should start praying for something else. He theorized in our case God seemed to be taking a "no pain, no gain" approach toward strength training.

He was joking...I think.

Lately though I have been wondering about prayer and the particulars

One of the Sunday traditions in our church is to voice our prayer concerns. Some people are quite brief, simply asking for prayer for a friend or loved one with little or no explanation. In church, I fall into that category. Others can go into great detail about ailments, work problems, fears, and frustrations.

No matter how it's done, I cherish this time, although not everyone in our church family feels the same about it. Some folks feel that many of the details are unnecessary. They cringe when someone starts explaining the intricacies of a medical malady or the nuances of their financial misfortunes.

I had a friend at church tell me that she believed we should restrict the prayer requests to something along the lines of, "Please pray for Bill" or
"keep the Main family in your prayers." She said, "God knows the details."

I guess that's so, but I have to disagree. Some of these intimate moments of sharing are used to unfetter my friends from heavy loads they carry. In turn they are lifted up. Who better to hold them; who better to nurture and calm them; who better than us...the body of Christ?

Certainly God knows my heart, knows my needs, knows my every desire before I do. However I also believe God wants us to engage Him...often and unashamedly. I suspect God wishes we'd communicate with Him a lot more and leave nothing out. In my moments alone with God I ramble and rage. At times I bellow and beg. I hold nothing back.

I simply can't believe the Creator of time itself has any need for the Reader's Digest condensed version.

Psalm 105:4
Look to the Lord and His strength; seek His face always.

Wednesday, February 11, 2004

AT THE HEART OF FAMILY

When my stepdaughter Lisa was younger she would sometimes chastise us to spend time together as family, and whenever she said the word, "family" she would gesture with her hands, carefully tracing a heart shape in the air that was completed when the tips of her fingers touched at what would be the heart's bottom.

I am in love with Amy for any number of reasons, but one of the perks of being in love with her is that I also get to love her side of the family.

We travel to Ohio each summer to spend time with the whole passel of relations: Amy's folks, her brother Mike, his wife Terry. Amy's sister, Lisa and her husband Michael "Wayne". All their kids. All our kids. It's a great thing.

I didn't grow up with family. My parents died when I was young, my brothers and I have never been especially close. I have an Aunt whom I adore, but cousins are out of the picture...or in asylums.

Once, many years ago, while driving back from Ohio with the kids, I halted the conversation because it had started to drift into nit picking about family. I felt compelled to emphasize what a precious thing our children enjoy. It may be hard to believe considering the vast wisdom I spout here so often, but I rarely imposed my grand thoughts on our kids when they were little...this time was an exception.

I knew it was important.

I believe each of our kids can still remember that conversation, at least as well as the first time I inadvertently uttered the word, "Hell" in exasperation (that's a story for another blog).

What our children had then, and still have today, is such a treasure that I wanted to make sure they didn't overlook or underestimate it. They have relatives who love and cherish them, not only parents, but grandparents, uncles, aunts, and cousins. But they're not simply relatives...these are people with whom they have relationships!

I don't know how to put a value on that...in honesty I don't think you can.

Mike and Terry went back to Ohio yesterday after an all too short visit which was wondrous in many ways, not the least of which was how comfortable it felt. I know their visit helped Amy immeasurably. I know it also helped me more than I can adequately express.

Tomorrow, Amy's sister Lisa arrives. She too will be welcomed easily...because she is family, and we are completed by each other.



Family life is full of major and minor crises -- the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and divorce -- and all kinds of characters. It is tied to places and events and histories. With all of these felt details, life etches itself into memory and personality. It's difficult to imagine anything more nourishing to the soul- Thomas Moore.

LIKE, REALLY

This is a cute article about people who like say like too much. My real pet peeve these days is people who say, "basically".

In writing, the word I like really try to avoid is basically "just". I think I had an English teacher once who basically thought that the word "just" had like no real purpose unless you were talking about fairness.

Like how just is that?

GENERAL CONFUSION

I don't like to write about politics, there are already enough folks doing that. I have to note however that Michael "miserable failure" Moore's candidate for the Democratic nomination has waved the white flag.

As of this writing, Michael "miserable failure" Moore is the top response in Google when you search for "miserable failure", but that may change. Sometimes Google is weird.

Anyway, Wesley Clark..the man who favored abortion up until the time of birth is out. I think we should all breathe easier.

See ya General and remember, when the going gets tough...well, never mind.

Tuesday, February 10, 2004

JUST DOGGING YOU

Moments ago I gave a friend a reference for adoption.

I wasn't expecting to. The phone rang. It was some woman on a bad sounding phone line asking to speak with Amy. Since Amy is sleeping, I asked if I could be of help. She said she wanted a reference for a friend of ours who wanted to adopt...a bull mastiff.

Because of the poor quality phone line I asked her to repeat that....but sure enough that's what she said.

I'm something of a dog freak so I know what a bull mastiff is....for those of you who might not be acquainted try to picture a Shetland pony...on steroids.



I didn't mention our friend lives in Oklahoma where I think dog fighting is still legal. I didn't mention that I thought our friend might quite possibly be insane.

I gave a good reference.

I sure don't want her ticked off....she might sic her dog on me.

Monday, February 09, 2004

BREAKING THE RULES

I try to live my life according to certain rules. Most are spelled out clearly in my religious beliefs, but some I admittedly make up on my own.

One of my rules is that if I make an appointment with someone and end up waiting more than 25 minutes without an explanation...I leave.

I started to abide by that rule this afternoon at the dental office. I was on time for my appointment...there were no other patients visible, yet I waited...and waited.

I was only there to get my teeth cleaned.

I've become accustomed to waiting for doctors - and I might add for those faithful readers that this rule does not apply to Amy's surgeon, who has no concept of time or propriety...these are my rules not Amy's - but my rule does apply to dental hygienists, perhaps that's unfair but it's my rule.

I was walking out the door when a receptionist poked her head out from behind her glass enclosed sanctuary reminiscent of a scene from the Wizard of Oz, saying, "Oh my..Oh my! Someone will be with you soon!"

It worked. In mere seconds my very apologetic dental hygienist magically appeared.

On the upside, my teeth are now clean.
On the downside, I need a crown.

If you look into your crystal ball you'll see a Visa bill for 350 dollars in my future.

I mention rules only because yesterday we broke a few. Amy was untethered for the first time in months. No feed bag. No central line. No nothing.

We had to go to New Braunfels to drop off Lisa so she could head back to Baylor, and also to see a client of Amy's who has patiently waited for a computer issue to be resolved for the past month while Amy dealt with her medical situation. As a bonus, Tiffany agreed to meet us there.

Amy wasn't feeling real well, but while her brother and his wife were here she wanted to go to Gruene (pronounced Green for those of non-Germanic heritage), a quaint little town with shops and restaurants resting on the Guadalupe river. We knew we wouldn't be there for long, but we were all eager to get Amy out of the house.



We didn't behave.

It was wonderful.

We went to a fine restaurant just for potato salad and onion rings.

We made the waiter think we were escapees from a nut hatch.

Tiffany tried very hard to pretend she wasn't with us... and we laughed.

We laughed a lot.

Soon, Amy was in dire need of rest and we left....her pain was still very much present.

But so was this small memory.

We bent the rules, it caused some pain. It also caused some laughter.

In the end, I believe the scales will balance out in our favor.

A CHIP OFF THE OLD BLOCK

We have a friend who chews ice all the time.

She shouldn't read this story.

It does present some interesting possibilities when it comes to choices for caskets though.

Sunday, February 08, 2004

A LINE ON OPTIMISM

At some point in our marriage, Amy and I had to establish a rule that if something was bothering her, i.e. I did something to tick her off, she couldn't hold it in all day and them dump it on me at bedtime. I have a hard enough time sleeping.

I'm thinking of a new rule now...don't let the first thing you say to me in the morning be, "Guess what happened last night?" referring to some medical crisis I slept through.

As Amy recovers from her surgery she's been for the most part entrenched on the couch. She finds it more comfortable sleeping there. We've now renamed this spot, "Camp Amy". This morning I staggered out to check on her and she was awake. She said, "Notice anything different?" - my astute observational abilities were working as usual...i.e. I hadn't a clue what she was talking about, so she then pointed out that her central line (the semi permanent IV that provides her with food and some medicines) was no longer attached to her body.

She apparently tripped over it while getting up at some point during the night and the whole thing yanked free. There was no bleeding. She got on the phone immediately and called the folks who provide our home health care and they suggested having another one put in. When I got up, we woke up a doctor, who didn't seem particularly concerned and said we could wait until Monday to have another line inserted.

I was bleary eyed when Amy told me what happened. I was a little freaked out.

Now that I've had some coffee and a little time to reflect I think I may look upon this as a backwards blessing.

Her health is not jeopardized, and we'll be able to address this latest situation with little fanfare.

For today though, Amy has no foreign objects in her. It's the first time in months that has been the case. Part of me wonders if God is borrowing a line from a McDonald's jingle and saying, "You deserve a break today."

I'm going to look on the bright side and consider today a day of rest...sort of how it should be all the time.


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One addendum: We did establish a new rule right away...medical crises in the middle of the night are not dealt with alone.