Saturday, January 31, 2004

SLEIGHT OF MIND

Question: What do Amy and this man have in common?




If you answered, they're both moving kinda slow...you're right.

You're also old, or you watch too much Nick at Nite.

Amy may be home from the hospital, but it's quickly become apparent that she's got a lot of healing to do. We had a scare this morning which we thought was going to send us back to the hospital (in an ambulance) but I think we're going to be okay.

I spent much of the day cleaning the garage - I figure if I keep Amy medicated she won't notice all the stuff I'm throwing away.

This is a job that's needed doing for some time.

In truth, there are lots of things that need doing around here, but I'm usually pretty adept at ignoring all of them.

Today, I was determined to attack the garage...

When my friend Teketha's daughter was having surgery a week or so back, a lot of friends and family gathered to be with her before she went under the knife. In fact, Teketha was concerned about having so many people crammed into the surgical waiting area. She feared it would make her daughter feel even more uncomfortable.
There sure were a bunch of folks, and soon we had forgotten the hushed protocol that everyone assumes is appropriate in such places. We were all talking. There was laughter. There was story telling.

Teketha said to me, "If I ever have surgery I don't want a crowd."

Teketha's daughter was in a great deal of pain, but it wasn't long before she was taking part in the conversations...and the laughter.

Next week, Amy's brother and sister-in-law have graciously offered to visit. Soon after that, I hope to convince Amy's sister to do the same.

There won't be much to do here. We've got cable and crossword puzzles.

Still the visits will do wonders for Amy..and for me.

The truth is that it's sometimes easier to see the world clearly if we're distracted from looking at it so intensely.

Plus, the garage won't stay clean for long...I need witnesses.


"I think nighttime is dark so you can imagine your fears with less distraction." - Calvin from Calvin & Hobbes

Friday, January 30, 2004

PARTING SHOT

Seeing Amy get wheeled out of the hospital today was among the more glorious images to behold...at least to me. Amy, however, was none too pleased to see me standing by the car door fiddling with my camera. Hence a few artistic modifications to the one photo I took.



She may be weak and depleted....but I still don't want to rile her up.

AT LAST

We're home. We're whole.

Thursday, January 29, 2004

WAITING GAME

Still waiting for the elusive washer repair man. I set aside the afternoon for this task only to have him call saying, "gee, I'm running late...could we reschedule for tomorrow?'

I told him no. He'll have to come out tonight. No matter the time.

I have other plans for tomorrow.

I'm planning, if the stars align properly, on bringing Amy home from the hospital.

Mr. Maytag may not be happy about that...but I am.
=====
Addendum: Mr. Maytag kept me waiting for 8 hours...and then called saying he couldn't make it.

He doesn't know what he's getting into....odds are he's going to have to deal with Amy now.

Thank God.

Wednesday, January 28, 2004

A CLEAN PERSPECTIVE

Laundromats are under rated.

I'm still waiting for our washing machine to be repaired - a part is on order which apparently must be hand crafted by a Hindi sect atop a mountain somewhere, because I've been waiting for 5 days. It's no big deal...I've got this patience thing down to an art now.

In any case, I decided today that it was time to forego my now common practice of hurdling the massive pile of my dirty clothes in our bedroom - although that is truly my only consistent daily exercise regime - and haul all the laundry to a laundromat. I might have been able to hold out another day but the pile had grown so large I was fearful of a laundry related injury which might have made for good blog fodder, but would have been embarrassing to explain in the emergency room.

"Well Doc, I cleared the whites with grace, but the heap of colors was my downfall"

I must admit it's been years since I've been in a laundromat. A lot has changed. Now there are giant washers, super washers, and even mega washers which I believe you can either use for washing clothes, or rent out as a weekend retreat.

They actually encourage you to shove everything you can inside these gargantuan machines as long as you restrict yourself to inanimate objects.

The real bonus is these genetically altered Maytags wash the clothes in 18 minutes. Being a middle of the road kind of guy, I opted to use two super washers whose exact capacity is roughly equivalent to what you can fit into a fleet of Yugos.

The dryers are huge too. They easily hold 3 loads of clothes and unlike the dryers of old which I recall being more akin to coin operated car washes where they were timed to stop about a minute too soon requiring you to feed them more coinage, these actually worked. 75 cents for 30 minutes and all the clothes were dry.

There was even entertainment. There were several small children, including one young boy taking great delight in opening all of the floor level dryer doors.



There was a young Jehovah's Witness who offered me reading material, but objected to me trying to snap his picture. There was a woman washing what appeared to be the carpet from a hotel ballroom...those mega machines really do hold a lot.

I had prepared myself for an arduous afternoon combatting boredom and competing for dryers...instead I was in and out with seven loads of clean clothes in less than an hour at a cost of about 6 bucks.

Heck...that's cheaper than a movie, and actually it was probably more fun.

Tuesday, January 27, 2004

THE WHITE FLAG AND THE CHICKEN

I have been thinking about the nature of surrender.

In many respects I've been forced to surrender the decisions about Amy's health care to the medical professionals. I've fought for information wherever possible, but in the end I have to have faith in their judgement. It's never easy.

Tonight I wrote out some thoughts on surrender but decided they were more appropriate for some whining teenager's diary, so I deleted them.

I sloughed it off thinking surrender is for chickens...it's for the French.

Then the phone rang.

"Michael, it's Teketha" the voice on the phone said.

Teketha is a woman in my church. The woman whose daughter recently underwent surgery at the same hospital as Amy. She has had a hard time lately too. We've spent some of that time together.

"I'm making chicken and you're coming to dinner." It wasn't an offer, it was more like marching orders. Teketha is a strong willed woman.

I hemmed and hawed and made excuses.

"I just got home after making two trips to the hospital today. I've been up since 2 a.m. I'd be lousy dinner company."

"You can just come over and grab a plate and leave!"

Teketha is a persistent woman.

I thanked her for her offer again, and whined some more.

"I really just preheated the oven to put in a frozen pizza. I'm in my sweat pants...I'm all grubby."

"I'm a good cook. Who wants frozen pizza? You'll want my chicken!"

Teketha is a very caring woman.

"I really am okay, you don't have to take care of me", I assured her.

"I don't have to do anything, but you have to eat my chicken. You stay in your grubby clothes and when it's cooked we'll bring it to you!"

Teketha is not French.



Sometimes you have to let the church be the church.

This is a lesson I have preached, but in truth I have not practiced real well.

Thank you God, for giving me that lesson tonight...to chew on.

All to Jesus I surrender;
Now I feel the sacred flame.
O the joy of full salvation!
Glory, glory, to His Name!

ALL THE WORLD'S A STAGE

I work for the largest radio company in the world. I'm proud of that.

When I started working for them they owned 8 radio stations, today they own some 1200...less than ten percent of the stations in the country.

This week in San Antonio there's an FCC pseudo-hearing about "media consolidation". It serves no real purpose other than to let a handful of politicians make the same points they've made in Washington to the ridicule of their colleagues. However a plethora of wackos with axes to grind and facts to distort are gathering here because our Washington politicians are giving them a stage.

Some of these folks are anti war.
Some are anti fur.
Some are anti-Republican
Some are anti-trade.
Some are anti-globalization
Some are anti-business
Some are unemployed musicians.
Many are full time protesters.
None are pro anything.

One "organizer" sent out an email today saying folks like me are "robber barons".

Don't I need epaulets or something to qualify for that title?

The protesters outside our company headquarters today dressed up as pirates.

The people I have worked side by side with for nearly 20 years dress like normal people. They're guilty of being capitalists.

No apologies.

We're also guilty of organizing blood drives, toy drives, breast cancer runs, United Way fundraisers. We're guilty of building houses for the needy on our own time, and giving millions of dollars to charity.

That's only the beginning.

One thing you can't accuse us of is organizing protests and dressing up as pirates.

We don't have the time for that.

Monday, January 26, 2004

HITTING HOME

DAY 20 - I'm tempted to start writing these little updates about Amy like a plot line from the TV show Survivor.

Amy is not getting out of the hospital today.

That's the bad news. The good news is we had a good discussion with Amy's doctor. He provided us with information and more importantly Amy with some badly needed reassurance.

There's light at the end of this tunnel and we'll get there before they snuff out my Tiki torch.

THE ESPRESSO SHOT HEARD ROUND THE WORLD

Back in December, Amy and I included a bag of Starbucks coffee in a care package our church was sending to our friend Erin in China. Erin's not a coffee drinker, but I figured she might be able to find someone to gift it to or trade it for something. Today she sent us an email with a picture of a fellow coffee addict working at an orphanage in Northeastern China with that bag of coffee.



Too cool!

Sunday, January 25, 2004

PROPAMAMA

"I do not intend to drag her around because I think I need her as a prop on the campaign trail" - Howard Dean prior to his loss in Iowa

"Dean said in an interview on Saturday that he believes his wife's presence is helping him, and his aides evidently believe so, too. The campaign has said it is distributing 50,000 videocassette copies of an interview the couple granted to ABC News on Thursday." -Associated Press report from Saturday 1/24

THE PUZZLE OF BALANCE



I'm holding the pieces together..barely.

I spent the morning with Amy, as I have the previous two Sundays, but today I left the hospital early enough to attend church, something I admittedly have purposely avoided.

It's not that I didn't want to be with the very people I adore and with whom I've chosen to worship God. It's that I knew their outpouring of genuine love, prayer, concern and consolation would tip my focus from the emotional tightrope I've been perched upon.



I was right.

It's difficult to remain stoic and steady in a roiling sea of tenderness...but there are also far worse ways to drown.