The Main Point by Michael Main

TO EACH HIS OWN

I deleted a previous post about a blog I found offensive. The blog's author says I, and others, misread his intentions...perhaps so.

I don't think I'll go back though.

SHUT YOUR EYES TO THE WORLD

We came home last night from the Christmas party to a disturbing message on the answering machine from our friends, John and Denise.

John's sister has been battling cancer and evidently something went awry with the chemo treatments. At one point in the evening they believed she was going to die. At Amy's urging, I drove over to the hospital to be with them for a few minutes. The conversation was a rapid fire litany of incidents of medical chaos and confusion. There was stress, and anger and frustration. It didn't take me long to realize these dear friends, who have been through so much, didn't need counsel as much as convincing.

They went home to get some sleep.

Sometimes that's all we can do.

Nuzzle up to the quiet comfort of night... knowing God is awake.

Tiny Bubbles

I was sitting here trying to think if there's anything else I want to write about before the primary event of the afternoon - my nap - when I started trying to blow bubbles off my tongue.

When I was a kid, I discovered - in some way that kids discover stuff like this - that I could form a bubble on my tongue and gently blow it into the air. I remember for a while I was quite good at it.

I mentioned the other day an old friend from Junior High had found my blog and the emails we exchanged brought back that seemingly repressed memory of bubble blowing. Specifically how our Junior High school music teacher sent me to the principal's office for blowing a bubble at her.

At 13, I considered blowing bubbles off my tongue a unique and praise worthy talent.

She considered it spitting.

Everyone's a critic.

Guess I shouldn't put that nap off much longer.

FRIDAY FOLLIES

Friday has arrived, that's always a good thing. The company Christmas party is tonight. I don't think Amy and I have been to an actual Christmas party for my company ever. They're usually on inconvenient nights (read any day during the work week) or we've had a conflict, or it just seemed un-fun. Tonight however we're making an exception to the stick in the mud rules which I enforce far too rigidly. We won't turn the lights out in the joint, but we'll be able to spend a couple of hours in a large saloon the corporate dollars are renting for the evening crowded with some 900 other people.

It's hard to describe my joy at the thought, so I'm not going to think too much about it. I'll hang onto Amy and we'll have fun. We need a night out.

The party planners have envisioned a "Casino night" where you can't win money, but if you don't lose all your chips you can buy a prize. I suspect the best odds will be on the flu bug spreading to everyone.

MEN

You have to take this with a grain of salt, but this study out of Canada is likely to have women saying, "Yeah, tell us something we didn't already know."

Hey don't blame me...blame Canada.

MAD DOGS AND PHARMACEUTICALS

Amy finally broached the subject with the doctor. It was such a delicate matter.

She said she thought he really needs help. He seems confused. He has a hard time getting off a chair if he has go left instead of right. He howls for no reason. He barks when it's dark.

Mercifully, for a change she wasn't talking about me. She was talking about Winston, our special needs dog. Since the dogs were in for their vaccinations anyway, Amy decided to discuss their mental health with the Veterinarian.. The Doc concurred with her diagnosis.

Winston is quite likely one enchilada short of a Mexican plate.

So we're putting him on drugs. Yes, our dog is on antidepressants.

I went to Walgreens yesterday to pick up a prescription of an Elavil generic for "Winston Main". The Pharmacist didn't even blink when she said, "Oh, he's a dog."

I know I heard a small gasp emanating from the woman behind me in line though.

Welcome to the new millennium.

I gave Winston the first pill last night.

I came home from work today to find him frolicking in the destructive aftermath of what was once a red plush football toy.

This is your dog.

This is your dog on drugs.

Oh yeah, so far this is working great.

INFECTIOUS GIFTS

That's not paisley.
It's evidently what testosterone looks like under a microscope. The tie is one of many Infectious Awareables you can buy...just in time for Christmas.

Testosterone-The Ultimate Power Tie.

CALLING SANITY

I tried to take a picture of the moon the other night. My little digital camera doesn't have a zoom. It didn't capture the moon's majesty. It looks more like part of the sky is missing.

It did remind me of a story though...one Amy reminds me of when, in her opinion, I periodically need humbling.

Some time back I was driving home from a church function and called Amy from the car. She was driving down a road not too far away. I said something like, "I know this is going to sound silly, but does it look like there's a hole in the sky to you?"

For whatever reason there was a blotch in the cloudless heavens. A gray gash.

To me it looked liked the fabric of the sky had been torn. I kept driving...it didn't move. I angled my head...it looked the same. I slowed down. I sped up. It was still there. That's when I picked up my mobile phone and called Amy.

She was silent for a moment or two and then said, "Oh I see it too!

It's a plane."

Her laughter drowned out the rest of the conversation.

Mobile phones should come with a warning label, "If you're living in a world filled with illusions of your own making...use caution before dialing."

CLINTON ARRESTED

The title of this post ought to be good for a few blog hits.

I don't know why police might suspect George Clinton of using drugs.

Do you?

SPIRITUAL SHORT CUTS?

This is a hard to believe story.
First off, it's difficult to fathom that someone can actually get 100 thousand dollars to study spirituality when their stated goal is know "enough about how it works to be able to offer the same experience to anybody seeking spiritual growth."

Huh?

Someone explain it to me.

Will they offer spirituality pills?

"Just add water!"

Baptisms would certainly never be the same.

ENVELOPING GOD

It does take a certain amount of chutzpah to open God's mail.

RUSSIAN ROULETTE

The New Year approaches and I am already seeing the inevitable on the horizon. Vows to eat healthier...to exercise. Perhaps there is another choice though. Maybe I can just find out if this kids' doctor is on my HMO.

LAPPING IT UP

I have to admit I haven't quite gotten into the Christmas spirit yet. Maybe it's because all the kids have grown up. Maybe it's because we're still a little unsettled with Amy's health...maybe it's because it's close to 80 degrees outside.

We held our Radiothon over the weekend (raised more than $150,000.00 to buy toys for kids) at a local mall in the same area where hundreds of parents were lined up with their children to get pictures taken with Santa Claus. We've held the Radiothon at this location for years and it always strikes me as odd. Our set up takes up so much space it forces the parents and their kids to line up rather rigidly along one wall.

Then again, maybe the folks in charge of the mall have a certain method to their madness.

We didn't have malls when I was small enough to sit on Santa's lap. I don't remember where this photo was taken. Since I spent my early years in New York, I suspect that's probably a genuine Macy's Santa, but there's no certainty. I know he earned his money...three kids on his lap at once. Getting my brothers and I to sit in a car seat without punching each other was an accomplishment, to get us all on some strangers' lap had to be a true Christmas miracle.

I look at this picture and only one thing comes to mind -- 40-plus years later, and I still have the same haircut.

ASSORTED CLUTTER

Stuff that still needs to be filed somewhere in my brain....

I've been Googled and found by an old, old friend from Junior high school. A pleasant surprise. He also made the astute observation that with the power of search engines like Google now...are high school reunions obsolete?
======
Watch less TV and eat more veggies.

But be gentle about it.
======
We got around to watching "Bruce Almighty" a week or two ago. Meant to blog about it...but didn't. I loved it. Didn't find it offensive...or at least not too offensive. I liked the fact that the main character, even infused with the power of God, was unhappy and unfulfilled without his girlfriend, Grace.

Grace completes me too.

WHERE DID IT GO?

Sunday slipped away.

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The Main Point by Michael Main ©

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