Saturday, August 02, 2003

WAXING ON WAYNE

My brother in law pointed out this article.

Why are so many killers and other criminals named Wayne?

Don't believe me? Here are links to various criminal or accused criminal "Waynes" that I found in 3 minutes searching google news for today.

A Wayne accused of murder-Victim stabbed, bitten and burned.
A Wayne accused of hugging and kissing young boys, not his young boys.
A Wayne convicted of fraud.
A Wayne accused of rape.
Another Wayne...another murder
Another Wayne...a multiple murder.


I've long held the belief that people named Wayne are predestined to evil deeds.

If your name is Wayne, I'm sure you are the exception.

I heard a theory once that a lot of men were named Wayne in the 50's, 60's, and 70's because their dads were big John Wayne fans. The theorist believed all those Waynes, saddled with an implied duty to live up their father's manly image of them, became disillusioned and turned to crime.

Of course, John Wayne was a good guy.

Then again, his real name was Marion Morrison and his middle name was Michael.

OUT OF THE STARTING GATE

Took Lisa to go see "Seabiscuit" last night. Excellent movie, better book. It's an inspirational story. I thought about how this old horse came back so often as I embarked on a bicycle ride early today around the neighborhood. I'm out of shape and my bike is in worse shape than I thought.
The neighborhood still has too many hills (it's all coming back to me now).

If we stick with a horse metaphor, I'm no where near Seabiscuit...I'm probably closer to Alpo.

I'll have to get the bike worked on a bit before I can do any serious riding...it's still too hot to ride most days anyway.

Anyone in South Texas can sympathize with this guy

Friday, August 01, 2003

EXERCISE

I vowed today I would get our bicycles ready to ride, which primarily meant scraping off the rust, wiping off the dust, and inflating the tires. Before I could take the bikes to a nearby gas station to put air in the tires though, I had to get our bike rack ready. Several months ago, when I was also toying with the idea of riding my bike, I started fiddling with the bike rack and a little nut fell off...scampering into that pit of debris we blithely refer to as our "garage." After crawling around the boxes and boxes of what I call "junk" and Amy calls "stuff someone will buy in a garage sale" looking for the little nut, I decided I was a little nuts and abandoned the entire idea of bike riding.

Now, I have no idea where to look for that little nut, and of course I don't have one in my little kit of "assorted nuts of all sizes except the one you need" that I purchased a Walmart, so I had to drive over to the hardware store to buy another nut. My car overheated on the way, but I made it back home, seven-cent nut in hand.

After struggling with the bike rack trying to remember where the various straps go, I decided that the convoluted way I attached it to my car was "good enough" and lifted the bikes aboard. Next stop: the gas station.

50 cents for air. I didn't have 50 cents. Next gas station - 75 cents for AIR??? I could buy seven nuts for that!!

I became determined not to "pay" for air.

Five gas stations later, engine temperature gauge and my frustration gauge both nearing "the red", I found an Exxon station that waived their 50 cent air fee "for customers", which is apparently the label given anyone who can read the sign on the air gadget and has the audacity to go inside and ask them to turn it on for free.

I fill the tires, get back home. The car didn't blow up, but one of the tires falls off Amy's bike as I unload it. Luckily this is a "quick release tire". Why we need quick release tires, I don't know, but I guess some people have sudden urges to strip their bikes of their front tires. Having a quick release tire must be handy for them. In any case, even I am able to put a quick release tire back on. It only took about 10 minutes.

I'm pretty sure it's secure. Guess we'll find out. Poor Amy.

It's 95 degrees during this process. I'm drenched in sweat, covered in dirt and grease, and I haven't even ridden the bike.

The bikes are ready though.

Maybe I will be...tomorrow.

Right now it all seems like an exercise in futility.

FRIED EH?

It's Friday.

I'm tempted to leave it at that...but of course I won't.
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Woke up from my nap yesterday to the greeting from my lovely wife of, "We have a leak."

That's what I get for waking up.

220 dollars later the leak was fixed. Thank God for merciful plumbers. Of course now we have holes in two walls, but they're covered up fairly well by my radio.



I'm sure we'll get around to patching the holes....one day.
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Car overheated bringing Lisa back from work, haven't ventured down that path yet, but I don't think my mechanic will be as lenient as the plumbers were.
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They've torn up the street outside our house, for what reason no one seems to know, although I'm fairly convinced the monstrous asphalt eating machine they used to do it was responsible for the plumbing leak since our entire home shook from the rafters as the blacktop gobbling gargatuan's gaping maw churned through the neighborhood.
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Our electric bill is now coming close to exceeding our mortgage payment...and August is only one day old.

But it's Friday.
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After thought

Found an interesting site collecting photographs/images from various Christian bloggers to weave into a Digital Quilt. Each picture links to a blog. Very cool.

Thursday, July 31, 2003

THE GOOD,THE BAD AND THE UGLY

The Good:
I'm employed for at least another 12 weeks. Ratings are out and for the first time in ages both WOAI and KJ-97 had good books.

The Bad:
I noticed as I was filling my caffeine-freak-sized thermal coffee mug with chewable coffee this morning that the coffee pot seemed to be fuller than I expected. I didn't think too much of it until I was about 4 miles down the highway. I believe a good bit of yesterday's coffee was still in the "fresh" pot I made. Ugh.

Did I drink it? Set your alarm for 1:45 a.m. and answer that question.

The Ugly:
Perhaps you saw this "Reuters" story the other day....

PALESTINE, West Va. (Reuters) - Jessica Lynch, the wounded Army private whose ordeal in Iraq was hyped into a media fiction of U.S. heroism, was set for an emotional homecoming on Tuesday in a rural West Virginia community bristling with flags, yellow ribbons and TV news trucks.

But when the 20-year-old supply clerk arrives by Blackhawk helicopter to the embrace of family and friends, media critics say the TV cameras will not show the return of an injured soldier so much as a reality-TV drama co-produced by U.S. government propaganda and credulous reporters.


It was attributed to a reporter for the Charleston Daily Mail named Deanna Wrenn...only one problem, that's not the story she wrote. This was her lead:

ELIZABETH--In this small county seat with just 995 residents, the girl everyone calls Jessi is a true heroine--even if reports vary about Pfc. Jessica Lynch and her ordeal in Iraq.
"I think there's a lot of false information about her story," said Amber Spencer, a clerk at the town's convenience store.

Palestine resident J.T. O'Rock was hanging an American flag and yellow ribbon on his storefront in Elizabeth in preparation for Lynch's return.

Like many residents here, he considers Lynch a heroine, even if newspaper and TV reports say her story wasn't the same one that originally attracted movie and book deals


A Reuters editor in England apparently changed the story, but left Wrenn's byline. You can read her account of what happened here.

I don't believe in media conspiracies...but I do believe in media bias. Someone should be fired, but they didn't do us the courtesy of giving us their name.

Wednesday, July 30, 2003

SHORT SUBJECTS

Looking up...

They buried Eddie Cantu today. He's in Heaven, there is no doubt.
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Looking down...

I have something in common with Winnie the Pooh.




Too many of my shirts fit like this....

I'm vowing to get my bicycle back in shape to ride. Presumably that will mean I'll ride it.

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Looking desperate...

Really? With all the negative press President Bush receives, the economy still struggling, and more than a year before the election- this is the opposition's answer?

Please no kissing, and lose the beard.
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Looking for something new...

I like this site. 60 seconds to express yourself, no thinking, just writing. Only a few folks slip into immediate profanity. Electronic graffiti with a theme.
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Looking silly...

I was dismayed by ABC's coverage of the Inglewood, California court assault case involving a white police officer accused of beating up a black kid. You didn't hear about it? Good. You shouldn't have. It was an assault case! Why is this national news? I'll tell you why, because ABC hoped it would result in rioting. It was very dramatic...except there was no drama. No one rioted. An ethical news operation would have dropped coverage. ABC Radio offered special reports.

My shirts may not fit, but it's only my belly hanging out...ABC reminds me of favorite quote from Eeyore, "It's not much of a tail, but I'm sort of attached to it"

WHEN IT COUNTS

The "hit counter" has hit 1000. Of course I'm fairly certain 800 of those hits are 'spiders' crawling for email addresses and 150 are me logging in from the office, but why dwell on it?

Just to keep a balance, I put an 'anti-counter' on this page also. It generates a random number any time someone logs in.

Yes, I'm easily amused.

Okay...back to work.

Tuesday, July 29, 2003

THE LIFE OF REILLY

I added another letter to my Ignatius file today. I call it that in deference to Ignatius Reilly, the main character in the alarmingly humorous, and somewhat offensive, Pulitzer prize winning novel, "A Confederacy of Dunces" by John Kennedy Toole.

The character of Ignatius is too complex to outline here, but suffice it to say he's over schooled, and believes he is underrated.

I put a broad spectrum of stuff in my Ignatius file,( I just noticed the business card from the Bulletin Man) but it's mostly letters. There is a standing order in the newsroom that if a letter comes in from a "wacko" I get it. I enjoy trying to decipher these mass mailings of mania. I try to glean what the catalyst was that put these scribes on their slightly wobbly paths, convinced that a littering of media mailboxes would somehow right their lives. These are always mass mailings, although many have after thoughts scrawled in the margins or on the outside of envelopes.
They all complain about some perceived injustice...USUALLY IN ALL CAPS. Many contain copies of related correspondence, corroborating evidence or simply xeroxes of the various indictments bearing their names.
Most are addressed nebulously to "TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN" or "DEAR SIR", but some are more cryptic...today's for example was addressed to: "THE ONES RESPONSIBLE...WHO KNOW WHO THEY ARE."

After that, the commonalities wane.

I have a marvelous letter from a man named Verdie Head who claims to have been an employee of the Bureau of Engraving. He says he was fired nearly 40 years ago and believes the government has been conspiring against him ever since, which is why young women, especially librarians, have been "enticing" him for the past 20 years.

I have a 16 page letter on newsprint from Bobby Graham of Tom, Oklahoma. He's a little hard to translate, but I think he believes there's a connection between the letters he mails, the eruption of Mount St. Helens, and a number of bombings, most notably the Oklahoma City bombing. He included a copy of the analysis of his urine sample, which he points out shows he's been exposed to arsenic.

One of my all time favorite letter writers is a gentleman by the name of Don Caton. He's convinced that someone broke into his car and installed a listening device which is somehow hooked into all the radio stations in San Antonio. He knows it's true because whenever he's in his car talking to himself, it seems like the disc jockey on the radio is talking back to him. He's certain it's a well organized attempt to convince him that he's mentally ill.


I don't save these letters to mock these people. I keep these letters to remind myself that life should be lived not analyzed. These ranting writers help me remember to be thankful, life could be much harder. These people I've never met, and have no plans to meet no matter how well medicated they may be in the future, help me keep the minor from becoming monumental.

And sometimes, they remind me, that it's okay to complain...

Someone's always listening...

Psalm 10:17

You hear, O Lord , the desire of the afflicted; you encourage them, and you listen to their cry

Monday, July 28, 2003

KEEP HOPE ALIVE

"Guess whose dead?" Yeah, you're right. *

It's amazing to think of the changes Bob Hope saw in his lifetime.

The year Bob Hope was born only 14 percent of US households had a bathtub. Alabama had more people than California, so did Iowa, Mississippi, and Tennessee. The population of Las Vegas was 30.

The average life expectancy was 47. The third leading cause of death in the United States was diarrhea.

In 1903, most women only washed their hair once a month, usually using egg yolks or borax for shampoo. Canned beer hadn't been invented. There were only 144 miles of paved road in the United States and only eight-thousand cars. **

Thanks for the memories.

*twisted reference family members will understand
** statistics from the "Information Systems Advisory Body of the Los Angeles Board of Supervisors" (is a blabs?)
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Speaking of inspirational people...don't you know this guy is glad his Dad didn't carry home a refrigerator?
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We said goodbye to our friend Heather yesterday. She's moving to Kentucky. I'm betting she turns around when she finds out this is the standard license plate there.



No kidding. That's really it.

How embarassing.

Sunday, July 27, 2003

SCATTER SHOTS

We just got back from Kerrville and I've been kicking myself for not taking a picture of the wrinkled old man I saw there as we were leaving. He was all decked out with doodads, trinkets, and beads riding a motorcycle about 8 times his size which was adorned with equally kitschy clutter. If I had that picture I could blog about living life to the fullest and make a snide remark about Kerrville being the proud Hill Country Retirement Community for the legally insane....but I didn't take the picture. You'll have to take my word for it.
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I'm not going to post the photos of the dead sons of Saddam, but for anyone who hasn't seen what they looked like....this is close.



To many folks in Texas that's an even more horrifying site. Jerry Jones is now lurking around San Antonio. It's at least somewhat comforting to know we've banished his plastic surgeon to Iraq.
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It rained yet again today. Just enough to increase the humidity to 99.9% and make the grass grow some more.

It's been a mild summer...everyone keeps telling me that, but I've been absolutely miserable. My standard reply now is, "Yes, but it's a wet heat."